


dirty puppet strings redux

by O61



Category: BlazBlue
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, im so sorry for this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-17
Updated: 2019-12-17
Packaged: 2020-05-13 11:33:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19250365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/O61/pseuds/O61
Summary: obvious cw for rape“Are you going to tell me to stop calling you that? Save your breath. It's who you are, and you know it. Your personhood doesn't matter. You've failed to do anything you were made for.” Lab testing, Ars Magus aptitude, fusing with Nu. It doesn't matter what. From an objective standpoint, Ragna's a failure.





	1. restriction

**Author's Note:**

> this is half vent about trauma, half because I got permission to rework something of a friend's  
> obviously i don't condone rape  
> title pending cause i don't know if i wanna keep it and i can't think of anything else rn  
> ctrl + f and find !! if you wanna skip the Bad Part

“This has been nothing but a disappointment.” Relius sighs, gesturing to Ignis. She warps behind Ragna, hauling him up by the back of his jacket, making his sword clatter to the floor from where he was using it to stand. “I made that body, therefore it is mine.”

_ I don't know what the hell you're talking about _ , Ragna wants to say,  _ but the only one I'll ever belong to is myself _ . He doesn't realize what Relius means until he starts to untie his hakama. He tries with all he has to fight his way out of Ignis's grasp, but he's too weak and it'd be hard to truly get away from something her size in the first place. “Get the hell away from me!” Panic sharpens his senses and fuels his mindless flailing enough for him to land a hit on Relius, but it's easily ignored. 

The puppeteer grabs Ragna's ankle when he tries to kick him again, and only then does the piercing unease of his mask's empty eyes dawn on Ragna. It makes his stomach turn. “Stop struggling.” 

Ragna doesn't want to listen, but Relius waits until his struggling subsides on its own. He spits blood that lands across Relius's mask, which he wipes away with disdain. “I said back the fuck off!” 

“And what are you going to do about it?” Ignis throws Ragna onto the ground before she disappears, allowing Relius to plant his foot in the middle of Ragna's back. He presses down until Ragna wheezes in pain. He can't help the feeling of triumph that comes from towering over one of his most interesting rogue experiments. Ragna might have been something invaluable if Jubei hadn't interfered or Terumi had brought him back. Even if he wasn't, Relius doesn't see any right for him to live as he pleases. “You can't do anything, Five. Accept it. You can't even fuse with Thirteen like you're supposed to.” It takes Ragna a little too long to realize he means Nu. 

“I'm not--”

“Are you going to tell me to stop calling you that? Save your breath. It's who you are, and you know it. Your personhood doesn't matter. You've failed to do anything you were made for.” Lab testing, Ars Magus aptitude, fusing with Nu. It doesn't matter what. From an objective standpoint, Ragna's a failure. Ragna wishes he could at least crawl to his sword, but he can't move. He's not sure if it's more because of Relius's words or his body's lack of response. His muscles are locked up as if venom were crawling through his system, rendering him paralyzed and in pain, and the pressure on his ribs doesn't help. As soon as Relius moves his foot, Ragna makes a feeble attempt to drag himself forward, but he doesn't make much headway until he's shoved back down. Relius can't let him get away when he's already so close. 

 

!! skip here if this triggers you

 

The warmth and closeness of Relius's body against Ragna's is sickening. He needs to get away from this. Why can't he just move? “Sick bastard… I'll kill you…” he makes his best attempt to growl, but it ends up a faint mumble as he struggles still, only furthering Relius's twisted excitement. His hakama is unceremoniously shoved down and Relius has to pin Ragna down by his throat to make him stop struggling enough for it to be inconvenient. 

“I've made Ignis's anatomy rather…  _ incompatible _ with my own. You'll have to do.” Relius's own pants follow suit, and even he isn't sure if it's the convenience of the situation or some neglected desire that fuels his eagerness as he shoves himself into Ragna. Ragna freezes, a shaky, miserable noise pulled from the depths of his chest as violent tremors overtake him from the shock. He wants to scream for help as he claws at the ground from the searing pain of forced entry, still trying desperately to do  _ anything _ he possibly can to get away, but his throat seizes up. This can't be happening. This is some spectacularly fucked up nightmare that he has to wake up from soon. It must be. Isn't it? His frantic rationalizing is put to an end when Relius slams his head against the ground to stop his squirming, then he moves. God, why does he have to move. The sensation of Relius's skin against his is like sandpaper and he's sure something is going to end up ripped to shreds. “You're just making it more painful for yourself,” Relius says nonchalantly, trying to ignore when Ragna finally screams, loud and clearly in agony. It feels like something tore but Relius evidently feels nothing other than whatever small noises of pleasure that slip from him betray as he slams himself into Ragna over and over. Tears well in Ragna's eyes and Relius's lips twitch upward slightly. Ragna wishes he couldn't see the tears that steam down his cheeks. He wishes this wasn't happening. He wishes he was never made. The hand around his throat tightens enough that he can barely breathe in order to silence his screaming and sobbing and he digs his fingers into it, black spots dancing across his field of view. Try as he might, it won't budge. “Shut. Your. Mouth.” The brush of Relius's breath against his skin sends a wave of revulsion through him and he makes a choked, agonized noise that was supposed to be a scream but ends up barely audible. Relius won't give him the mercy of letting him pass out. Of course he wouldn't. The only upside to being choked is that the black tunnel of Ragna's vision blocks Relius's face, not that he can see a lot though his tears otherwise. “Unbelievable. I've made Ragna the Bloodedge cry. That's pathetic. This is the only purpose you serve anymore.” Relius's movements get more deliberate and harsh and Ragna wheezes, writhing weakly and sobbing harder. “You should get used to it.” The friction is giving way to something Ragna doesn't want, something that makes his insides writhe from the foreign feeling. It makes him feel sicker than he already is, but he does his damnedest not to vomit so he doesn't choke. His face is scarlet and his eyes and throat burn, and it feels like he's going to crack his teeth from tensing his jaw, trying to stifle himself. He sobs as silently as he can, determined not to give Relius the satisfaction of hearing anything else from him. But something slips that's unmistakably a moan and if he thought he couldn't feel more shame he was dead wrong. “Oh? Look at that, you're enjoying this. Embrace it.” Relius takes that and Ragna's limpness as an invitation to go harder and harder still, letting Ragna's throat go to make way for Ragna's miserable moans that dissolve into throaty gasps. Ragna gulps desperately for air, still clinging to the hope that this will all be over soon, it  _ has _ to be, there's no way this could get any worse. He doesn't feel much of anything anymore, just a numbness, like static has overtaken his limbs, making them heavy and useless. 

“For the love of-” his voice halts for a second- “god… shut  _ up _ ,” Ragna mutters through shallow breaths, voice weak from being choked. Every time Relius slows even slightly he starts to think that he's finished, but that hope is pulled out from under him every time. 

“You know as well as I do that nobody, especially not a  _ god _ , is going to hear you.” Relius smiles smugly, leaning closer to Ragna's ear. “Admit it. You wanted this.” Ragna barely feels when Relius's hands caress him through his shirt, and he shudders, revolted by the touch and the stifling heat above him. He doesn't care anymore when Relius rips his shirt open, his gloves now sliding over bare skin to the mark on his collarbone. “This body belongs to me, therefore I don't need your permission.”

A sob slips easily from his throat and he grinds his teeth together to keep more from following. “Go to hell.” 

A pitiful noise is forced from Ragna when Relius goes back to his unyielding rhythm and he's disconnected completely, eyes glazed over. He stops so much as thinking; it's all too painful. “You would do well not to insult me.” A moment later Relius stops, but Ragna's gratefulness is cut short when Relius crosses in front of him and hauls him to his knees. Something Ragna doesn't want to acknowledge is shoved into his mouth, a thumb accompanying it to keep Ragna's jaw open should he become coherent enough to decide to bite down. He couldn't if he tried, even if keeping his mouth open as he's shoved into repeatedly makes his already sore jaw hurt more. Tears form in his eyes again but he pushes them back. He doesn't have it in him to cry any more than he already has. There's nothing left. He's more content to be numb by now than to be in pain or, god forbid, pleasure. Come is forced down Ragna's throat when Relius give a final, deep thrust before pulling himself from Ragna's mouth. Ragna recoils when some sprays on his face, and he's promptly dropped on the ground, chin smacking painfully against the floor. Relius says nothing, but his mockery is loud and clear. 

 

!! end

 

The feeling of being absolutely defiled is enough to make him cry again, but he holds back until he hears Relius make himself presentable and walk away, saying something that Ragna can't register, and he's probably better off for it. He can't handle more of Relius's demeaning. He can't handle more of anything relating to Relius. Or anything at all. Vomit he tried to fend off so valiantly creeps up his throat and he moves enough to retch that he doesn't have to lay back down in it. He can't even feel when it leaves his mouth, just the comparably mild discomfort of his stomach trying to turn itself inside out. He flops back to the ground after, too exhausted to move or think about leaving. Relius simply watches from where he lingers in the hall, examining the newfound frailty of Ragna's soul after what just transpired. 

It feels like it takes hours, but Ragna finally forces himself to his feet to pull his hakama back up and wipe the come off his face with his sleeve. He wants to vomit again, or cry, or both, but he refuses to. Not here. Not until he's absolutely sure he's alone. Maybe not even then. Pitying himself isn't a luxury he's sure he wants to afford. Something inside him feels ruined in many more ways than one. The whole of his body screams in pain. For the first time in his life, Ragna wouldn't care if he died. It'd be an awfully pathetic death, but he doesn't care. Hands grab him when he starts to limp down the hall and he makes a strangled noise in response. 

“Remember, Five,” Relius murmurs, words slipping easily into Ragna's ear and rendering him frozen again. “You'll always be mine.” 

Ragna struggles free after the few seconds it takes to come to his senses. He doesn't think as he sprints away, simply letting his body carry him forward until he's gone from the desolate halls leading to the Cauldron. Gone from the building entirely. He doesn't stop until he collapses in the woods outside Kagutsuchi, his spent body crumpling to the dirt against his will. His eyes well with tears as he stares blankly at the stars above, a numb feeling spreading outward from his chest. It doesn't take long for him to pass out from the exhaustion of it all, and he doesn't have the wherewithal to move anywhere more comfortable.


	2. reluctance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whoops this got long

It takes Ragna an hour after he wakes to even sit up. His back hurts from the gnarled roots he fell asleep on, and everything else hurts from Relius.

Relius.

He forgot about what happened until just now. He wishes he didn't remember. A million thoughts flash through his head, and none are pleasant. Relius's words worm their way into his ears again. Is he meant to be used? Is he a failure? Is he even a fucking _person?_ There were solid answers to these questions less than twelve hours ago, but now Ragna's at a loss. All he knows is he was too weak to fight Relius off and it was his fault. He feels worthless. Maybe he was just made to be used. He has to force himself to a nearby river to wash the feeling of Relius's hands off his skin.

Even while bathing he can't get a reprieve. Like a bird with a broken wing, he just can't function like he used to. His head throbs. Every move he makes sends a sharp pain through his hips. The feeling of something thick and terrible won't leave the back of his throat. His mind won't lay off. The sentiments of belonging to Relius and being a failure echo endlessly through his mind, along with Relius's demeaning. Even seeing his own body disgusts him. He's tempted to scrape his body along the bottom to the river so the rocks can free him from the feeling of being in his own skin. It feels like the only thing that could possibly get the filth off of him. That, or drowning. Either one works. That hollow feeling in his chest from before takes hold again, and he wants to sink under the water completely. It's starting to make the aforementioned options look more appealing. But he hauls himself back out of the river anyway and gets dressed because he's been presented with a million other opportunities to give up, and he sure as hell isn't taking this one.

Tao arrives, as usual, a little later than expected. Jubei had to escort her to make sure she didn't wander off. "Good guy! Can we get going neow? Tao's getting tired of waiting."

"She got sidetracked," Jubei says, giving Ragna an exhausted look. He had to play with Tao in order to get her to calm down and focus on finding Ragna. Ragna doesn't give much more than a nod in response.

Tao's eyes narrow. He'd usually at least say something. "Is something wrong, good guy?" Tao doesn't quite have the vocabulary to express it, but Ragna looks as awful as he feels. What sleep he did get was fitful and unfulfilling.  

Ragna makes the world's shittiest attempt to smile. "'Course not." Jubei and Tao both give him a look that says 'that's bullshit and you know it.' And it is. Something is wrong. _Everything_ is wrong. But it's not something he can bring up in polite company. And he doesn't want to tell anyone about what happened, even if his life depends on it. He doesn't know if he could handle facing what happened outside his head. The way Jubei looks at him both makes him want to cry and (try to) kick his ass. Ragna stands, brushing himself off and taking a deep breath to steady his voice. "Weren't you just whining about wanting to go?"

-

There's an extra spring in Kagura's step as he follows Tager through Yabiko. His excitement is almost palpable, though he refuses to brazenly display it. He refuses to look like a giddy schoolgirl. The challenge of facing the Grim Reaper sounds very promising, though. He hopes Ragna will put up a fight- why _wouldn't_ he- so he can see what tricks an SS class criminal has up his sleeves.

But finding is proving to be quite the challenge.

"He's probably using a cloaking Ars. Tager, pay closer attention to the readings," Kokonoe commands over Tager's radio. Easy enough for her to say. She doesn't have to deal with finding someone who might not even be here.

It takes another half an hour, but Tager's sensors go off the charts towards the edge of the crowd, showing unprecedented seithr readings that only come from Ragna and Hazama. Tager places a hand on Ragna's shoulder and he flinches, whirling around to face them, sword already in hand. The Ars he was using drops and Ragna seems to materialize from thin air, meaning Kagura can finally see him. He's strangely beautiful, even when visibly pissed off. His eyes gleam with disdain, but all Kagura sees is how lively he looks. "How the hell did you find me?" Ragna demands, eyeing Tager warily. He wants to pretend being touched out of nowhere didn't throw him off, but it's difficult. "What does Kokonoe want now?"

"You're under arrest. If you don't give us trouble, it'll--" Kagura doesn't get to finish his sentence before Ragna's swinging at him. He expected as much, so he parries the attacks easily. Tager could easily lift Ragna up by the back of his jacket like a kitten, but at least he's letting Kagura have his fun. Their swords clash together loudly, but neither of them seem to care about the crowd staring or giving them a rightfully wide berth. If anything, it eggs Kagura on.

Ragna doesn't pull his punches, even though he's sore and definitely not in the right frame of mind to fight. He wants this to be over with. He fights like he has nothing to lose, and that isn't far from the truth. Even if he weren't fighting an NOL soldier, there isn't much he cares about losing now. Both he and Kagura are bruised and bloody by now, and there doesn't seem to be a clear victor. Not until Kagura slips up and Ragna almost lops his head off, if only Tager hadn't intervened to both block it and knock Ragna out.

"I had that," Kagura insists while he catches his breath, watching Tager clumsily lift Ragna's unconscious body. It looks like he bit off a little more than he could chew. The Grim Reaper deserves his title. He can't help but think about the empty, dead-eyed look Ragna gave him when he nearly took his head off. What so thoroughly extinguished the life behind those eyes?

"I'm sure you did," Kokonoe responds, and Kagura swears. It's easy to forget she can see whatever Tager sees, including Kagura almost getting himself killed.

-

“So, how’d it go?” Kokonoe asks from where she sits in a chair in Kagura’s office, playing on her handheld. She needed a break, so she pretty much stopped paying attention until and after Ragna was gracelessly apprehended.

Kagura rolls his eyes. “You saw. It was fine. It’s _me_ we’re talking about, here.” Hibiki stifles a laugh from where he goes through a filing cabinet in the corner. Kagura frowns at him, narrowing his eyes. He pauses to both sit at his desk and contemplate what he’s going to say. “I will admit, he’s pretty strong.” Strong enough to nearly kill him. “I might’ve sold him short.”

The beastkin snorts. “Said everyone who ever met him.” Kagura’s kind of impressed anyone would underestimate someone known to be incredibly strong. That only speaks to his strength, he supposes.

"He was off his game today, through," Tager says matter-of-factly, awkwardly adjusting his glasses. He wants to sit, but if he got on the floor, he wouldn't be able to get up. Downside of being so massive.

Kokonoe is interested enough to look away from her game. "Was he?" The thought that nearly decapitating someone qualifies as off his game makes Kagura reevaluate just how lucky he was earlier. Which is, evidently, _very_. If he wanted to argue (and for pride's sake, he does) he could say he was also off his game, considering the only reason he lost was because he happened to make a mistake.

"He wasn't as… _into it_ as he usually would be. He seemed absent." Kokonoe knows exactly what he means. What she did see of the fight wasn't as aggressive as Ragna usually tends to be, even though he started it.

Kagura, however, doesn't. "How so?"

"I'll see what it's about," Kokonoe says, steamrolling right over Kagura's query.

"...I asked a question."

She snaps her console shut, strolling back to her office with Tager in tow. "Talk to him about it yourself."

Screw it, Kagura decides. Talking to Ragna would be more interesting than whatever he's supposed to be doing, so he sneaks off before Hibiki can stop him.

-

When Ragna comes to, he's on a bench in a cell. Which makes sense, but he can't help being exasperated with the sudden, characteristically shitty twist of fate. They're probably putting together the trial right now. He doesn't know how long he was out, but he's surprised he isn't already on the chopping block. He couldn't really give half a fuck either way at this point. Looking at the bars and concrete walls gives him a strange sense of security, though. He hasn't felt this safe since he was living at the church. As surely as he can't get out, nobody else can get in unless they have a key, which he would believe few people do.

And one of them just so happens to want to bother him.

Kagura flips off the generator supplying electric current to the bars of the cell so he can lean against them. "Earlier, I was _trying_ to say it'd be easier if you didn't cause trouble." Even though there were a million other ways to get Ragna into his and Kokonoe's clutches without causing trouble. He kind of counted on that happening by going along. But he has to save face somehow.

"Yeah, and you were _trying_ to arrest me," Ragna mumbles after about a minute, leaning back against the wall and crossing his arms.

That's the most Ragna's said to him directly, and it's enough to make him realize that, though rough and flat as a board, his voice is oddly soothing. "Still. Would've made life easier." Kagura's met with silence. He waits a moment longer before saying, "I'm Kagura, since I'm sure you've been _dying_ to know."

"Piss off."

"Y'know, it's a shame to waste those looks on such a nasty personality."

"Go to hell." As soon as the words leave Ragna's lips, he regrets them. His mind is back in Relius's grasp, and he struggles to shake the memories off. His mind fights back just as hard, going through every excruciating detail to the point that he remembers how Relius _smelled_ ; something he never even thought about. He's sure he's going to scream or vomit or cry again when-

“Hey. Don't space out on me.”

Kagura's voice snaps him back to the present. He's not with Relius. He's in jail. Relatively safe. He glares at Kagura, who looks back at him with thinly veiled interest. Neither says anything until Kokonoe interrupts their staring contest and tells Kagura to open the door so she can bring Ragna to her lab.

-

Ragna panics and slaps Kokonoe's hand away without thinking when she starts to unbutton his shirt. His mind and heart both race, and she takes a step back because he looks like a caged animal, his expression twisted in disgust. "What's your deal?" She's done this a handful of times before. Why is now any different? "I just need to see your arm, idiot."

"I'll do it myself." His hands tremble as he unbuttons his shirt the rest of the way, pulling his left arm free. That awful sticky feeling in his throat is back, and he does everything he can to keep from falling into a coughing fit. He's still and silent as Kokonoe checks his arm out, occasionally reaching for a tool or muttering to herself.

"Okay, you're fine there. Now, a physical." Kokonoe gets up to rummage through her drawers for a stethoscope.

"What? No!" Even though she wouldn't be touching him much, the arm was torture enough. Ragna doesn't want anyone's hands on him to so much as take his pulse.

"What, are you scared all of a sudden?" Kokonoe stops rifling and sits up in her chair to look at Ragna, watching as he shoves his arm back into his shirt. "Tager said something was up earlier. I wanna know what."

Ragna stiffens, swears under his breath. Of course Tager would notice something. He glances at Kokonoe, and he can't take the piercing look she gives him. It demands the truth.

He spills everything.

Not in graphic detail- in fact, he says as little as he can while still getting the point across- but he spills his guts nonetheless. His gaze is averted from Kokonoe the whole time, so he doesn't see how she nearly breaks the handle off her coffee mug as he goes on. Every word makes him feel more and more estranged from himself, but once he starts talking he can't stop until he's finished.

Kokonoe catches herself before she says 'How could you let that happen?' Even she knows that would be insensitive. She places her lollipop on her desk to put her head in her hands, and Ragna swears it's the first time he's seen it not in her hand or mouth. A heavy sigh leaves her nose. She might not be close to her cousin, but it'd be a lie to say she didn't care about him at all. "How long ago was this?"

"Few days."

They're both silent. Ragna doesn't really expect any sympathy from Kokonoe of all people, nor does he want it, but he expected… something. He's not sure what, but something. For her to pry, or say something different, or, god forbid, run more tests. But all that eventually comes is a quiet, "I'm done. You can go whenever."

-

Kagura lies awake in bed, thinking back on the day's events. His muscles still faintly ache from fighting Ragna, and it brings him to mind. It's strange; he's losing sleep over some criminal he doesn't know. But he almost feels bad, especially if their fight wasn't exactly fair. Even he could tell something seemed off when he actually spoke to Ragna. It worries him that he finds himself wondering what it is.

-

Something urges Kagura toward the stairs that lead down to the Cauldron. He gives it no thought as he begins his descent. It's somewhere he's been hundreds of times before. But this time, Kagura finds himself in a barren white room at the bottom of the stairs. A door slides closed behind him and the staircase vanishes. It seems endless; the walls are either incredibly far away or nonexistent. This is definitely a dream. The only other thing in the room is a writhing black mass, upheld by a hand above it and something he can't see. They slice its flesh, and even from a distance Kagura can see blood slowly pooling on the floor. It takes him a moment to recognize the squirming heap of a creature in front of him, but he'd seen it in picture books when he was young, and later textbooks when he was in the academy. 

The Black Beast. 

Kagura starts walking toward it even though his proper judgement screams for him to run away. What else is there to do, anyway? It's only a dream. As Kagura approaches, seithr saturates the air, getting thicker and thicker to the point that it's almost tangible. If this were real, he would have died of seithr poisoning twenty feet ago. The beast bows a massive head down to meet Kagura. It gives him a mournful but curious look, seven other pairs of blank silver eyes glaring down at him from where they're stuck in what he now sees are strings. They look much too flimsy to hold it up, but they manage. Kagura places a hand on the beast's nose, and it cements in his mind just how small he is compared to it. Its head is larger than his whole body. Distance made it seem smaller. The beast nudges his hand, making a low rumbling noise. Suddenly, the hand above moves and strings start to tighten and further constrict the beast, cutting deeper into its pitch black skin. It roars in pain and thrashes violently, shaking the whole room in its struggle as its cries become unmistakably more human. It gnaws and claws at the strings but they don't budge, sinking deeper still into the beast until Kagura can see bone. Its heads tangle together from all the thrashing in such close proximity and it gives a pitiful wail. Previously apathetic eyes now stare down at Kagura in desperation, full of what look like tears, silently pleading for him to do something,  _ anything _ , to help. 

A strange sympathy makes Kagura's chest ache. He  _ needs _ to help it. Sure, seeing an animal in pain makes one feel sorry for it, but this thing all but destroyed half the planet. It wiped out a  _ country _ . Why the hell does he feel bad for it? He raises his sword to try and cut the wires, but the beast snaps at him instead, sharp teeth easily crushing his torso and-

Kagura wakes in a cold sweat, gasping like a fish flopping uselessly on land as his heart pounds in his chest. His thoughts race equally as fast. He tries to calm himself down, but to no avail. Seeing that creature in pain left him with an unmistakable sense of dread that followed him into the waking world. He gets up to splash water in his face to quell his panic. When he sees himself in the mirror, he's jarred by the fact that his eyes are red and swollen, and he gapes in disbelief. 

He can't remember the last time he cried. 


	3. recourse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the last third of this.............. soft............................  
> relius deserves to get his ass beat. maybe in the future  
> i might add more chapters to this. might not. we'll see.

Ragna hasn't slept in a little under a week. He doesn't see the point anymore. Every time he shuts his eyes, he's assaulted by memories. Of Terumi, of Nu, of the church. Of Relius. Without fail, he wakes up ten minutes later crying and covered in sweat. That's deterred him from even making an attempt for the past three days. But his body eventually gives in from the exhaustion and he passes out the next night, his brain too jumbled and tired to give him flashbacks. 

Not quite tired enough to keep him from dreaming, though. In the dream, he's standing in a white room. The silence is deafening, and it makes Ragna realize he feels an uncharacteristic stillness in his chest. He tries to move, and one of his other heads snaps at him. 

_ Other _ heads?

It takes him too long to notice that he's that  _ thing _ the he and Nu are fated to become. It's disorienting, being so large and having other sentient parts of his body. His head droops down and he sees blood on the floor. His claws are slick with it. Kagura, of all people, appears in front of him, and only then does Ragna realize that something is restraining him. Something he can't see. He growls, but Kagura is undeterred, walking straight up to him and mouthing something he can't make out. His expression is desperate. He looks as tired as Ragna still feels. He reaches out and Ragna growls louder, but he makes no attempt to move as Kagura gently places his hand on the end of his nose, slowly petting it. It brings a weird feeling of deja vu, but Ragna leans into his touch. Kagura says something else as he pulls his hand away, raising his sword. Ragna flinches when it comes down, but he doesn't feel the hit. Kagura wasn't aiming for him. His sword bounces off of whatever he  _ was _ aiming for, and he grits his teeth and tries again. The same result. Kagura looks as if he's about to try again when he glances up, eyes widening in horror as he mouths something that is clearly  _ 'no _ . _ ' _ Ragna doesn't have the chance to follow his gaze before something cuts into his flesh and he screams, but his body is too exhausted and in pain for him to try to escape whatever's holding him. Too tired to even put up a fight. Absently, Ragna realizes that  _ he's _ the source of the pooling blood beneath him. He didn't even notice that he was already hurt. His claws gouge the floor in an attempt to mitigate the pain, but it just succeeds in leaving deep scars that reveal pitch back nothingness underneath. Something razor sharp easily slices through to his bones and he whines pitifully, raising his head just enough to look at Kagura. He's crying. They both are. 

Ragna awakens relatively slowly and peacefully, considering the content of his dream. He spends a moment awake on his back, staring at the ceiling and wondering what the hell just happened. Why he was the Black Beast. Why Kagura was there as well. 

Kagura, on the other hand, jolts awake for the fifth time this week wishing he could get some rest without it being unfulfilling and stressful. He rolls over, for once glad there's nobody else in his bed so he can sprawl out and not feel weird about tearing up. The Beast is stuck in his mind, tangled in intangible wires, limp, trembling, and hopeless, too tired and scared to resist anymore. He feels compelled to help, and he doesn't know why. 

-

Kagura goes to Kokonoe first thing in the morning to ask what's going on. When he explains his dream, her ears twitch slightly with interest. She has a vague idea of what's going on. Someone, she doesn't know who, since nobody knows about Ragna's plight, is intervening. Someone's trying to get him to help Ragna. But Kagura doesn't need to know that. It'll just make matters worse. Ragna doesn't seem to  _ want _ help. "I'm not a psychologist, Kagura. I don't think it means much of anything."

"Why do I keep  _ having it _ , then?"  _ Why do I feel so powerless? _

Kokonoe shrugs, making an 'I don't know' noise. "People have recurring dreams all the time." She turns back to her terminal, trying to get her mind off what happened to Ragna, lest she start planning some way to get back at Relius. She doesn't have time for that. At least, that's what she tells herself. 

Ragna conveniently decides to walk in. He waited in the hall when he realized they were having a conversation, and he heard all he needed to. "You needed me?"

"Made some updates to the IDEA engine." Kokonoe tosses him a chunk of metal that he catches with his right hand. "Absorb that." 

Without even blinking, the object turns into light that seeps through Ragna's glove and into his Grimoire. Kagura gawks. He shouldn't be as surprised as he is. "You can just  _ do _ that?" 

Ragna shrugs. "More importantly, we need to talk." Kagura follows him into the hall, slightly puzzled as to why he needs him. "Okay." Ragna pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs. "This is stupid as hell, but I had the same dream as you, except I was the Beast." 

Kagura raises his eyebrows. Looks like someone was eavesdropping. "You think it means something." It feels weirdly intimate to share a dream with someone. Especially something so stressful. 

Yes. He's not sure what, but there has to be something he's missing here. "I didn't say that. I don't get it at all."

"Well,  _ I _ do. I assumed you would too." There's a moment of awkward silence before Kagura speaks up again. "Is… something bothering you, by any chance? Or someone?"

"It's… That doesn't matter. Christ, why did I even do this," Ragna mutters to himself, turning to walk away. He knew he shouldn't have brought it up. What was the point? What the hell was he hoping to accomplish? To get Kagura involved in what happened?  _ Fuck _ no. He's the last person that needs to know anything remotely close to what happened with Relius. But all the same, Ragna was on the verge of telling him anyway. He doesn't know if he's suddenly desperate for pity, or sympathy, or just for  _ someone _ ,  _ anyone _ else to know what happened, but he isn't fond of whatever it is that's making him act up. 

Clearly, something  _ is _ wrong. Kagura wants to know, but doesn't bother to call after him, instead simply watching him walk off. He's going to get to the bottom of this. He  _ has _ to. 

-

Kagura stayed up nearly all night formulating more questions. Of course, when he goes to ask Ragna, he can't find him anywhere. Just his luck. He goes straight to Kokonoe's lab. "Where's Ragna?"

"Why is that any of your concern?" Kokonoe doesn't look up from her work. 

"I need to talk to him."

"You two are getting awfully chummy." 

Kagura huffs. "Now isn't the time.  _ Where is he _ ?"

Kokonoe finally gives him a sharp look. "You're not gonna tell him I told you?"

"Long as you tell me where he went."

"I gave him permission to leave." Kagura knows better than to question her. "Said he was going to Kazamotsu, I think. If you leave now, you can probably still catch him." 

-

It takes about ten minutes for Kagura to find him after he gets off the train. He's lucky Ragna stands out in a crowd. 

"You can't just walk around out in the open like this," Kagura hisses, grabbing Ragna's arm. Ragna straightens, jerking his arm away from Kagura. "I'm in the middle of something."

"We need you back at the branch."

Ragna glares at Kagura from the corner of his eye. "Don't lie to me." 

Kagura rolls his eyes. "Dammit,  _ fine _ , just come back."

"No." 

"Ragna--"

Suddenly, Ragna's form becomes distorted. Kagura realizes what's happening and grabs Ragna's wrist, effectively pulling himself away with Ragna as he's teleported to god knows where. 

-

"Rabbit, what the hell-" Ragna shuts himself up when he realizes he isn't at Alucard castle. He wasn't teleported by Rachel. It  _ did _ feel a little different. More refined, somehow, if that's possible. Lacking the sickening aroma of roses. Kagura lets go of Ragna's wrist when he realizes he's still holding it.  

"It offends me that you think  _ she _ is the only one capable of teleportation."

A chill runs up Ragna's spine. Why was Relius able to summon him so easily? He grabs Kagura's hand, hands shaking, weakly pulling him toward the door, but he can't take more than a step. His legs feel like lead. "We have to get out of here," he says, voice fragile and barely above a whisper. " _ Now _ ." Hell, he doesn't even know where they are. Aside from the fact that they're in front of a dead cauldron. The oppressive heat gives him the idea of Akitsu- Otsu. 

"Why?" Ragna's clearly scared out of his mind, and Kagura isn't sure what's going on. 

Ragna takes a shaky breath. "We just. W- we have to, okay?" 

"Don't think you can escape me that easily," Relius calls from behind them, snapping his fingers. Ignis appears, dragging them both backward by the collars of their respective garments. Ragna hardly struggles. She disappears soon after and Kagura turns to glare at Relius. "Ah, you've brought the Colonel with you." 

"Do you want a fight? Is that it?" Kagura says, hefting his sword. He looks over to Ragna, whose still trembling hand rests on the handle of his own sword. 

"I-... I can't. I can't do it. He…" 

"He knows better than to resist me." Relius adjusts his cravat. "Our previous engagement was rather nice, Five. I wasn't expecting company." 

"Uh. Who?" Kagura lowers his sword ever so slightly. 

Ragna stays silent, but defiance ignites in his eyes as he turns to face Relius. Relius's taunt was enough to replace his fear with rage. "Doesn't matter. I have to kill him." His voice is now steady with conviction. Malice burns in his gaze. He's almost convinced himself that killing Relius would somehow fix everything, though deep down he knows the damage has been done. Irreversibly so. If nothing else, he at least thinks it'll make him feel better. Putting an end to something that's hurt him should be satisfying, right? That's why he's after Terumi, after all. 

"I'd like to see you try."

"Wait, Ragna, you can't--"

"This is my fight. I've got it. I don't need your help," Ragna says over his shoulder before jumping straight in and having his sword effortlessly blocked by a large marionette hand formed from Relius's cape. Loud clanging fills the air as his sword comes down again and again, every blow landing on puppets instead of flesh. 

"This is  _ Relius goddamn Clover _ ," Kagura insists, but stays put. Even  _ he _ wouldn't stand a chance against Relius all by his lonesome. Ragna wouldn't either. He's not even sure both of them together would even the odds. And, as aggressive and physically strong as he is, Ragna doesn't seem like he's going to be able to keep up his pressure for long. Relius seems to pick up on this, simply pushing him away and parrying blows to bide his time. He doesn't even bother using Ignis, who floats silently beside him. Kagura knows he needs to lend Ragna a hand, since he  _ definitely _ doesn't have this, but can't bring himself to. He just stands there, paralyzed by indecision from the battle in front of him. 

Ragna's movements begin to slow as his breaths get more ragged. Kagura can see his chest visibly heaving as he brings Aramasa down again. Relius finally starts to fight back, commanding Ignis to slash at Ragna's torso again and again, leaving shallow cuts in her wake, but enough to still be of concern. "Now." Ragna's slow enough to react that Ignis has no trouble swiping Aramasa from his hand and slamming him to the floor by the back of his neck. He snarls, struggling to get on his hands and knees, but Ignis just shoves him down harder. "Since Five refuses to explain, allow me to illuminate. I created him. He must be one of my favorite creations, despite his rebellious streak and the fact that he's an utter failure."

_ Created _ Ragna? Ragna never acted like a Prime Field, but he supposes anything is possible. "What the hell is your point?" Kagura demands, ready to beat Relius senseless until he decides it's time to take his leave. He knows he isn't going to like whatever answer he gets. He grits his teeth. "Get on with it, so I can beat the crap out of you."

"Don't be so hasty. You can't stop me. I  _ own _ him. I always will."

"Like… like  _ hell _ you do," Ragna manages to choke out, and Ignis digs her claws into his back, effectively shutting him up as he struggles more and blood runs down his chin. 

"He is mine to use as I see fit. And he deserves it. He's gotten quite unruly, you know. He shouldn't be allowed to keep his free will."

"Shut up," Ragna groans, blood gurgling in the back of his throat. His eyes slip shut for a moment before he forces them back open; he's barely on the cusp of consciousness from the pain. 

"What the fuck have you done?" Kagura mutters in disbelief, nearly dropping his sword. His stomach turns. He doesn't want an answer. He has a good enough idea. 

"Nothing of any importance to you." Relius turns to Ragna. "Amaterasu heard your cry for help. You know I'll have to punish you for that." He snaps his fingers and Ignis's claws tighten around Ragna's neck, making him cough up more blood. Ragna's bleary gaze sets on Kagura, eyes desperate and hopeless all at once. Kagura can see the Beast from their dreams in him. Terrified. Pained. In desperate need and search of help. Relius bends down to caress Ragna's cheek and Ragna's suddenly much more awake, eyes wide as his body starts to tremble in fear. "Relax," Relius murmurs, almost lovingly, "and it'll be easier." 

"No. No, no, no," Ragna sobs, clawing at the floor, trying to gain purchase so he can stand, but Ignis won't get off of him. "Don't fucking touch me! You freak! I'll kill you! Do you hear me, you son of a bitch?!" Ignis's claws dig into him as she turns him into his side so Relius can run his fingertips down Ragna's chest. Lower still to untie his hakama. Ragna tries to kick at him, to shove his hand away, but his limbs are too weak. He's almost completely given up, but he still has to fight. Until he can't anymore. He's rapidly approaching that point. "I-  _ please don't _ ."

"It's always a different response with you. Most interesting." 

That's enough to snap Kagura out of his stupor. He's frustrated with himself for not acting sooner, but his body was frozen from terror and disbelief. He charges forward, slamming Relius a good distance away from Ragna. "Get the hell away from him!" Ignis swipes at him, but he slashes at her torso, pushing her back a few feet beside Relius. 

Relius sighs, standing, dismissing Ignis, and dusting off his cape. "I suppose that's it for now. I'll see you again sometime, Five." Kagura says nothing, standing between him and Ragna defensively. Relius laughs. "How charming. You think you can change that," are his parting words before he teleports back to his workshop, disappearing from sight within seconds. 

Kagura turns to Ragna, who's pushed himself into sitting up. He tries to help him up, but Ragna refuses his hand. Kagura drops his sword, joining him on the floor. "Don't come any closer," Ragna says warily, voice surprisingly firm even though it shakes. He's still trembling. He looks like his spirit is nearly broken. It makes Kagura's heart ache. All he wants to do is help. 

"...I'm sorry," is all Kagura can think to say. He realizes he means he's sorry he didn't try to protect Ragna sooner. He wants to pull him into an embrace, but he's not sure he wants to be touched right now. He feels horrible for trying to make Ragna tell him what was going on. "I'm not gonna hurt you."

"Don't be. I, uh… sorry. You had to see that." 

Kagura has the decency to be embarrassed that Ragna's shirt is in tatters and he can see the waistband of his underwear above his pants. Blood still seeps from the nearly mended wounds on his stomach. "It's not your fault." 

A pause. "I get it. It's like watching a train wreck. You don't have to look."

Kagura didn't even realize he was staring. "No. I mean, I- How… many times has he…" Kagura can't believe Relius almost assaulted Ragna right in front of him. It makes him sick. 

Ragna shakes his head. "Just once. But he's been spying on me for years, I guess." It feels different now that everything has been laid bare without him saying anything. Almost freeing. It's validating for someone else to know what happened practically first-hand. At the same time, being seen at his absolute lowest is absolutely mortifying. "There's no changing what happened. Not that he gives a damn." 

"Why did he keep calling you that?" 

Ragna gives a short laugh, devoid of emotion. "It's who I am. Or used to be. Something." He doesn't remember much of the lab, aside from needles and cages and having tubes from large machines shoved into his body. "I can't change it, as much as I want to. I can't change shit." He slumps over a little more, visibly sinking into his despair. Carefully, as if he's dealing with a wild animal, Kagura moves a little closer. Ragna spares him a glance, too exhausted to actually care. He unbuttons the top few buttons of his shirt and Kagura, slightly alarmed, glances away. It's like he walked in on Ragna changing, except he's legitimately uncomfortable. He jumps slightly when Ragna takes his hand, a spark running through him. "Look at me," Ragna says as he pulls Kagura's hand to his chest, placing his fingertips over the mark on his collarbone. Kagura's face heats up slightly when Ragna holds his hand there. "It's been there for as long as I can remember." He scoffs. " _ Rebellious _ . How could he expect me to  _ not _ be when he's the one saying that he  _ owns _ me? I don't belong to anyone. Not him, not anybody." He slowly moves closer and leans his head on Kagura's shoulder, closing his eyes. "I'm tired. Tired of letting the universe decide things for me. Of suffering. I'm not going to let it happen any more." 

Kagura straightens a little and pulls his hand back. He doesn't know why he lingered for so long. He doesn't know what to do now that Ragna is  _ touching him _ . A sense of camaraderie comes over him when he realizes they have the same goal. "I feel the same." He knows Ragna must still harbor some ill will against him, but he wants to be even closer to him than he is right now. Desperately. But the fact that Ragna's being so vulnerable isn't a bad sign. It's almost like their dream. The Beast slowly warming up to him when it realizes that he just wants to help. That he wants to ease his pain. 

"Says the Duodecim kid born with a silver spoon in his mouth."

"Hey, I've been forced into things, too, y'know." Nothing  _ nearly _ as bad as Ragna has. Kagura sighs. "I want to make sure nobody else has to suffer. Starting with you." He gently coaxes Ragna's head off his shoulder and tilts his chin up, and only then can he appreciate the full beauty of his features. His mismatched eyes. The soft curve of his lips. He leans in to press a soft kiss to those lips, heart beating faster from the simple action. When he pulls away, he finds that he wants to kiss Ragna's tattoo as well, but that would be much too forward. He leans back, and notices that Ragna looks calmer. Subdued. And he's stopped shaking. The smallest, shy smile graces his lips, and Kagura's heart flutters in his chest. "...Here," he says softly, taking off his mantle and placing it on Ragna's shoulders. "So you can cover up." He scrambles to his feet, clearing his throat awkwardly. "We should, uh… get back to Yabiko. Hibiki's gonna get on my case for skipping work." 

Ragna sighs, but this time it's in contentment. He's relaxed, finally. For the first time in a week. No bad memories, no feeling of hands where he doesn't want them, no deep sense of violation. It's a huge weight off his shoulders. He takes the hand Kagura extends to help him up. Grinning to himself, he doesn't let go of Kagura's hand as he leans close and whispers, "Thank you," before retrieving Aramasa and walking off, pulling Kagura's cape tight around himself.  

Kagura's face dusts with pink. He can't remember the last time he got this flustered. He follows Ragna, a smile that he tries to fight off finding its way onto his lips. 

Somehow, he doesn't think he's going to mind helping Ragna out. 


End file.
